The First Weeks

Nothing can prepare you for the reality of motherhood. The first weeks, healing the portal to existence with sitz baths and air drying on the bed, constantly breastfeeding baby skin to skin, awake for days on end. Good thing I washed my hair before heading to the hospital because who knows when that will happen again. In the thick of it - the fog we like to call it -

I remember thinking, whoa, new moms out on the road - look out!

My doula came for the first of two postpartum visits, and I could not have been more relieved. How could I have cared for so many babies throughout my life and feel so ill equipped caring for my own..? I wanted her to help with the first bath. Even with her there - let's just say, it did not go so well. Personal opinion, newborn babies do not need to be bathed much. You are constantly wiping their ass and all the surrounding area with cleansing wipes. A warm wash rag will do just fine these first weeks.

I also wanted my doula's help teaching me how to wear my baby with the moby wrap. That went well. After a proper set up, I learned you just have to stick that crying baby in there and soothe them once they are secure. Trust me, once they are securely in there, they will love it and you will have freedom for those soon to be aching arms.

My doula assured me I was doing great - AND YOU ARE! - and that I was a great mom - YOU ARE!! She said, before I knew it, I would be wearing baby, talking on the phone, and washing dishes all at the same time - AND YOU WILL!!! In that moment, I was glass that could shatter at the slightest impact. Simple tasks insurmountable.

She was right. I am not sure how long it took to get there. Felt like forever but I'll just say, after a few months I was doing just that and then some. AND YOU WILL TOO.